6USJAG
“Is he being weird again?” Lady Anne walks in on me and Daniel trying to get James off the floor. He is naked and crying, but, surprisingly, not drunk.
“Ups and downs the last two days.” I whisper, leaning over my most beloved mate.
“OK.” Lady Anne whispers back.
We whisper because William is sleeping. William has not been out of bed since he took all of Jim’s pills trying to kill himself.
Even James is crying quietly not to wake up his newly re-discovered old flame.
“I brought you something, James!” Lady Anne takes a bunch of what appears to be cat toys out of a plastic bag. Then she takes a bundle of shiny, reflective tinsel strings and shakes them in front of Jim’s face.
“Ohh!” Kellspell’s eyes light up. He tries to grab the tinsel strings, but Lady Anne moves it out of his reach. “Who is a good boy? Go get the ball!”
;She throws a small plastic ball with something inside of it that makes noise as the ball rolls under the bed.
“Ohhh!!” James breaks away from us and crawls under the bed after the ball.
He catches it there and giggling and happy noises are heard.
“What is happening?” Daniel asks, very surprised.
‘DeVo is a terrifying thing, but it has its moments.” Lady Anne takes the tinsel strings and lowers them so that James under the bed could see. His hand stretches out and grabs the strings.
Chewing noises are heard under the bed, and then Kellspell emerges with tinsel strings in his mouth and a bottle of whiskey in his hand.
“Here.” He hands the bottle to Lady Anne. ‘I found my old stash. I do not need this anymore.”
Lady Anne nods with satisfaction, take the bottle and, to our chagrin, pours it outside.
“I asked God to help me quit drinking, and this is what happened.
“We’re standing on the bottom of a sand quarry. There is a 90 degree wall of sand towering above me at the height of a five-storey building. There are trees and vegetation on top. I’m standing with some woman I do not know. There are people partying in the distance behind us.
And then, I see this large Grizzly bear coming our way. When only about 20 meters between us are left I know that fucker is coming for us. This is where he turns and heads straight for the quarry wall. And starts climbing.
On one hand, I’m glad the fucker did not go after us, but on the other - I see that the sand crumbles from under the bears’s feet, and yet, he claws his way up the 90 degree wall made of SAND.
I ask the woman by me - do you see the bear? And she shakes her head, her eyes are barely awake with a bored expression.
I give up on the muggle bitch and continue to watch the bear, who is already almost halfway up that wall. Still climbing. This is when the bear VANISHES. He was just here - dark-brown hairy mass on the background of yellowish sand, and suddenly - the bear is gone.
I literally watched him cease to exist half-way up the hill, in semi-shadows of vegetation and trees on top.
This is where I woke up.” Kellspell takes a well-deserved breath.
“Where did you wake up, Mr. Kellspell?”
“In the middle of the night, Malachite Constellation Headquarters, Level 1. But the weirdest part happened in the morning. The next morning I felt like a child. Granted, I never felt good as a child, but the point is, I was new, fresh, and I did not feel any desire to drink. I have not drank ever since. Only for the purposes of sex with H.M.”
“How long has it been?”
“Five days. You remember, I could not last 40 minutes to my next dose? It’s been five days since I emerged from that nightmare.”
“Is that what you think the bear meant? It came for you, but God directed it elsewhere, until it was completely gone from your life?”
“Yeah, sounds like it.” James agrees, studying Lady Anne’s features.
He is fascinated by her. They first met
“Lady Ti is not well, James.” Lady Anne takes a deep breath and fixes William’s blanket, pulling it over his slumped shoulder. “She may not make it to Christmas.”
Kellspell frowns, still chewing on the tinsel string.
“You are her last chance to retrieve Jaguar. If you do not get yourself together, the web will fall apart. We are only here because of you. And you have to fight for Jaguar.”
JKellspell: “I know Henry is in a lot of pain. That is why I will not contemplate suicide anymore. He always told me that he hated when I talked about it. To him - it is the untimate act of betrayal towards your family. Granted I have no family I care about, HENRY now is my FAMILY. He is the only one who gives a shit about me. So, I must do what he is asking me to do - quit threatening suicide.”
Lady Anne: How can you achieve that, James?
JKellspell: U-huh, right. It’s like asking a habitual offender to quit his burglaries. Or to ask an alcoholic to quit drinking. It’s just, when I wake up in the morning, about half the time, I am in a “flattened” state, under ego-control. There, the machine gives me along list of things to be upset about. I listen to that, and FULLY AGREE. Then, I drink a bunch of disgusting, destructive ego-protocols, like “self-pity (NES-sp poison), hatred, envy, and all that. But then I smoke blue ksill, and WOW - suddenly I RISE ABOVE all that bullshit. Like - I was a drawing on a piece of paper, and the ego trampled all over me with its dirty stacks. Like a newspaper on the street, stepped on and kicked by the passers-by. But after blue ksill I, the torn, beaten down, faded drawing in that newspaper, raise in a 3-d shape above the dirty pavement, all the troubles that were beating me, and everything the ego piled up on me to hurt me. And I see the Face of God. I hear His voice. he says - everything is fine. I’m going to take care of ALL of your issues.”
Lady Anne: “Why don’t you stay with Him, now that you have Awakened?”
JKellspell: I try, but, unfortunately, I fall back asleep. And again - I feel like a photograph in the newspaper - flying across streets, falling on the road. I feel the tires of cars press me even further into the unforgiving asphalt, I shiver under the relentless rain. Then I get picked by the wind, and thrown against a scrathy wall. Then I fell under the feet of some self-absobed person, who spits right into my soul, unaware that the photograph is alive and can feel everything. And then I fear the worst, as I see that the wind picks me up against, only to slam me with all its might on the sharp ends of a metal fence. The wire of the fence pierces the photograph in the newspaper, ripping my heart and soul. I bleed, I cry the invisible tears, I scream for help, but nothing comes out of my throat. My feelings a real, but to everyone around I’m put a picture in a torn piece of newspaper…”
Lady Anne: Why do you think you feel this way?
JKellspell, spreading his hands: Because THIS IS what I PROGRAMMED the machine to make me believe in the dream, which is tis reality! I fell here through physical birth, but in reality THE REAL ME is stil in that room, under the ego-device, that is dictating to me, who is now asleep, what I must experience. What we call “higher self” to us here is a mix of ego-voice and Father’s voice. But, deeply asleep and with no way of knowing which is which, we are just swimming in the cold, dirty sea of convoluted suggestions and explanations as to what is going on in my head and why.”
JKellspell: I know that Henry loves me. And I will give ANYTHING for him. I am shocked, that after my entire life as a torn shred of a newspaper, exposed to all the winds, and every possible abuse and humiliation there ever was, I was given a man who finds me very useful, unique, irresistible and valuable. I will readily give him my life for that. For how he makes me feel. He makes me feel SPECIAL. He may yell at me, he may beat me within an inch of my life, my Arkchil Operator may have resigned over how I was treated by Lord Carlton, but to me - he is the best. For I know why he is doing it. He is doing it because I can take it. And he is doing it because it is how he expressed his utmost love and dependence on me.”
Lady Anne: And why are you down today?
JKellspell: It’s the NEW MOON, that’s why. Yesterday was the last day I felt OK, because the Grace from the PREVIOUS waning moon was still upon us. But today I’m, again, exposed to the powerful pull of the dumb celestial object. For the next gruelling two weeks.”
Lady Anne: When that happens, what do you do?”
JKellspell: The same thing you do. You come to “your” ego, because you have NO ONE ELSE TO COME TO, and you whine - why… why… Why do I feel so shitty today? Like a broken fucking record. And the ego, of course, tells you what you PROGRAMMED it to tell you - it’s H.M.’s fault (insert the name of your partner here). And it advises you to “make revenge” to H.M. for how he ruined your life. You are in disbelief, because you KNOW that you LOVE your partner, and he did so much to make you happy… That is IF YOU STILL realise that. For the most part you’re too asleep to see that the ego is leading you away from someone you USED TO LOVE. But then this happened, and that happened, and what an asshole he(she) is… Blah Blah.”
Lady Anne: “This would need to come to God to help you be clear on WHAT IS REALLY HURTING YOU.
JKellspell: Yes, correct, you’re smart! That is why I admire you. Not only are you Awake on Level 1, you also consciously sacrificed yourself for the benefit of others, repeatedly and confidently. Big time, my Lady. That is why I submit to you. Because you have conquered “your” ego. Or, rather, defeated your own desire to keep coming to listen to the insane device.”
Lady Anne, smiling: Thank you. Mr. Kellspell. But let’s get back to our research into the roots of evil.
JKellspell: The roots of evil, ha, I never thought of it before. Ok… So you’re upset, and the ego is telling you that your spouse is to blame. It also gives you a LIST of shit your spouses did that is unforgivable. You remember it, and you get even more upset and depressed. When all that has boiled up in you, you come to the ego AGAIN (as you’re too asleep to remember the magic words to get to FATHER Who’d tell you the TRUTH.). That was ‘Step 1” of Further Separation. So, your dumbass comes to “your” ego, and the ego is only too happy to move on to Step 2 of “Grand Separation Plan”, or whatever it is you want to call this garbage. The ego is not ready to help you plot, HOW to make revenge to H.M., the motherfucker who ruined your life. And you go for it, believing all this shit sincerely. Totally buying into this smelly crap. You hurt him (her), having completely forgotten, WHO IS REALLY TO BLAME. Who started it. Who created the ego that gave me the drink that poisoned me? It was ME! But I programmed the ego to keep this from the “sleeping me”. Who PUT ME as a PICTURE in an eternally tormented piece of newspaper? IT WAS ME! But I programmed the machine to tell me to blame GOD. Who is currently trying to Awaken me to the REALITY. To Love and Protection and Care I haven’t known in 13,5 billion years.”
Lady Anne: So, we have established, that you’re in pain. But not because God would not give you a fate of a successful writer?
JKellspell: Yes, and no. I’m NOT in pain. In REALITY (Where God is Present and Clearly Visible) I’m not in pain. I’m only in pain in my sleep (Where God is a distant notion at best). And, so, some people hear that it is their spouse to blame. I hear that it is God to blame.
JKellspell: Have you read “Wizard of OZ”?
Lady Anne: Yes.
JKellspell: It’s similar. Only here the “Wizard of OZ” Leot knows that his world is built out of ice. And he is afraid of the sun, because his ego is telling him, that as soon as the sun rises - his world will melt away.
;Lady Anne: How so, Mr. Kellspell?
JKellspell: See, I’m the First Ray of Light to reach The Andromeda Galaxy. Leot KNOWS that as soon as I’m there, I will “melt away” the cold that caused every single civil war he ever suffered, because he refused to Awaken to the Face of God. He is scared of God. You know why?”
Lady Anne: No.
JKellspell: Leot is the most powerful, most manipulative being you’ve ever known. Not me, I’ve known worse. Lierance is friendly, but just as afraid of waking up, as Leot. His refusal to Awaken caused rivers of blood on Crumbling Rose, but Lierance refuses to admit it. In this episode he is on our side, so worry not that he is more fucked up than Leot. Anyway. Still, as powerful as he is, Leot is a hostage of “his” ego. “His” ego is brainwashing him that if he lets God into his world, his world would disappear.”
Lady Anne: I’ve heard of that on Andromedan TV…
JKellspell: No, you’ve heard that from me. The Andromedan TV would eat dog shit before it mentioned the word “God”. So, strike that out. Leot is mortally afraid of me. He knows I will bring CLARITY into the mess, LIGHT into the darkness. I will stop the civil war because I can SEE the reasons for it.
9USJAG
Lady Anne: Please tell me what happened yesterday.
;JKellspell, shrugs: Yesterday, as I was getting dressed to go out for breakfast, H.M. noticed that my underwear was somewhat ripped. He told me to get rid of it, and, instead of complying, I retorted that I get to decide when to throw away old underwear. That pissed him off, and he accused me of “being a Russian “bydlo”, despite 25 years in the USA. One thing led to another, and I said I was going back to Genesis17. And he said he will file for divorce. Obviously, “my” ego said - YES! OYOUR LUCKY BREAKTHROUGH! GO FOR IT! SAY MORE NASTY THINGS TO PISS HIM OFF! WE FINALLY GOT THE FIRE GOIN’! MAYBE IF YOU BREAK WAY FROM THE ASSHOLE, YOU CAN MEET A NICE HOLLYWOOD PRODUCER WHO WILL FINALLY LISTEN TO YOUR MOVIE IDEAS!”
Lady Anne, shocked: What did you respond?
Jkellspell: I looked at Father, and He was crying, that I was going to choose the dumb robot over HIM again. And although the robot was making sense, and Father was not (this is what it looked like, I chose Father. So, I apologised for my rude behaviour, and I told H.M. that I loved him.
Lady Anne, excited: So, our exercise worked! You imaged H.M. as your “little bear” who needs your love and care, and that is why you decide to abandon the ego and go for God’s Desire to Preserve the Seed Of Love?
JKellspell, looking at Lady Anne like she is speaking Chinese: No. My right top tooth was hurting. I imagined a bill of $500, and no money to pay it. I imagined $1500 a month worth of expenses connected to my mother and her caregiver (Merion!), plus my medical bills. So I got on my knees and begged for forgiveness, because I have no money.
Lady Anne, disappointed: OK. What else happened then?
JKellspell: And then ur turn came up, and we went into this busy restaurant. H.M. ate and still grumbled, because he was upset with my disobedience, and I was wishing for Dobry to be dead so that I could be off the hook, and could finally kill myself.
Lady Anne: These are terrible things, that you’re saying.
JKellspell: U-huh, whatever. You know what “terrible” is? ‘Terrible” is when you need 6 8 ounce units a day, but you can only take 4. And 4 is too much, because you’re gaining 2 pounds a week drinking like a sailor. “Terrible” is when you calculate that by the end of the year you will be 75 kg (now I’m 62), and the fat will get into your facial features. By the age of 50 you will turn into fat old “Missis Pississ” you’ve always hated, instead of being a writer (movie producer) you always dreamt to be. “Terrible” is when you see people half your age make ten times your annual allowance with H.M. ($24 000 +room and board) and enjoying their life, while you’re chained to an old motherfucker who shows you how mean he can be, because you spent 22 years serving him upon the advice of God, instead of beating feet, like “your” ego told you. “Terrible” is when you KNOW that God means well, you just can’t stop drinking because your dreams did not come true. ‘Terrible” is when you realise that you’re too old and too fat to change anything in your life, because all you know is indentured servitude. And you would to know any of it, my young Lady, because you spent a life of privilege and non-stop engagements. So did Henry, so did everyone else.
Lady Anne, grabbing the facts in front of her, much like a rock-climber who very nearly fell of the cliff, but got back and is now holding tight and progressing forward: What was the good part?
JKellspell: The good part was when I saw Daniel chained up and ready to be sacrificed in the name of Love. Apparently he is here to protect the Seed of Love that is Me&H.M. Once “my” ego manages to get me to direct a knife at the throat of my love for H.M., he will be there to lay his life to defend what is most important to Father. That was cool.
Lady Anne: See, you’ve got good team mates.
JKellspell: Please. I’m no longer five years old to believe this. Daniel is not the martyr he wants to be. At least, not yet. He DID GET WHAT HE WANTED way before he was 50. He may have spent his whole life TRYING to get engagements, but by the age of 37 he landed a project that lasted for 8 years. I care nothing for money, and it is not about money. The LONGEST I was EVER engaged in ANYTHING WORTH MENTIONING was 1 week. For 9 years. I week a year, nine years. And even that is long gone now. You think Daniel is my friend? You think YOU are my friend? I’m telling you, alcohol is my only friend. I’m looking forward to THAT. Not to any one of you. Every single one of you has three engagements a year. While I’m here, and no one gives a shit about me.
JKellspell, looking as if he was hit by a lightning: Fuck. I’d do anything to be his slave again.
Lady Anne, laughing now: You da man. The record shows that Jaguar had abused you ten times worse that H.M. could ever dream of. You took it, you loved it, you drained Jaguar into exhaustion (granted he is 99), and you sat by the door all night waiting for more. And then you tripped all over yourself to tell anyone who’d listen that Jaguar soaked a riding crop in his urine and hit you across your face with that.
;JKellspell, covering his face with his hands: OK, OK, you got me. I do not understand that myself. I hate H.M. for CARING for me, and I love Jaguar for torturing the shit out of me.
Lady Anne: You are an alcoholic and a violent sex offender, Mr. Kellspell. But above all, you’re a hypocrite. When you were with Jaguar, you never even thought of rebuking anyone about their successful engagements. You felt yourself at the top of the world and you PITIED all of us for not knowing the EXTASY of TRUE LOVE. I was there, Mr. Kellspell. I SAW your smug face every time you’d walk by me on your way back from Jaguar’s office. So, you CAN lay a sacrifice for love. Why not for H.M.?
JKellspell, rubbing his face with his hands: Ohhh… You’re breaking my balls, you do…
Lady Anne: I’m just trying to get to the truth, Mr. Kellspell, that’s all. So, what is missing here?
JKellspell: Patience… God is always right, ego is always wrong. I was wrong to have sided with the ego. I was pissed that I got no engagements, so I took it out on H.M.
Lady Anne: An alcoholic, a sex offender, a hypocrite AND a liar. I forgot your main title, Mr. Kellspell. “James Kellspell, The Greatest Liar”. You DID have an engagement this year. Henry sent you one, and you went to Los Angles for the filming of your and Darler’s story.
JKellspell: Ahh.. yeah… Can I have another gulp of whiskey?;
Lady Anne: Not until 10 am, Mr. Kellspell. It is 6:47 am now, and you’ve already downed two shots. Go smoke some cigarettes, come back, and I will tell you what to do if you EVER want to work for Jaguar again.
JKellspell, with burning eyes: YES?
Lady Anne, taking a long, deep breath: He would make you give him blowjobs in the middle of a freezing field. He’d grind your face to his crotch so violently that the buckle of his pants would leave a bloody mark on your forehead, he raped you in the woods for a goodbye. He’d whip you so hard you could not get up for hours. And here you are, salivating at the mention of his name.
RegJKellspell, sighs, hides his face in his hands: Fuck…
Lady Anne: You’d let him torture you to death with a smile on your face, but you would not let H.M. get you a new pair of underwear. Engagements, Mr. Kellspell? You do not give a shit about any engagements while you were with Jaguar. If it was a choice between the most lucrative engagement and a night with Jaguar, you’d choose Jaguar over that engagement, and, by golly, over your last meal AND your life.
JKellspell is not answering, watching Daniel come out of Henry’s Chambers in Henry’s dressing gown. He approaches Lady Anne’s bridgeplate and looks over the transcript of the conversation.
Daniel Garner (here on special invitation from Lord Henry Carlton): “An alcoholic, a sex offender, a hypocrite.” Impressive credentials, Mr. Kellspell. Don’t forget a sucker for punishment and a pain junkie.
;JKellspell, crushed by the attack from both of them at the same time: I would have disengaged from Jaguar. I knew we were buying the Emerald Filament just for the two of us, hurting the rest of the team.
Lady Anne, relentlessly: You only stopped when you both were FORCED to stop. Lady Ti found out and she was pissed, and she forbade Jaguar from seeing you until otherwise ordered.
JKellspell, watching Daniel removing Henry’s dressing gown, and flexing his
And here you are, whining about the second best thing (projects/engagements), because you know that seeking Jaguar secretly would hurt Lady Ti. And the only reason you are not trying to sneak out to see Jaguar is because you do not want to upset Lady Ti. I’m sorry to tell you, Mr. Kellspell, but your consciousness is a shred of what it used to be, and made yourself into Jaguar’s toy. You’d sell your soul to the Devil to get back to Jaguar. But you hate to take care of H.M., who is always there for you.
10USJAG
“Did you sleep well last night?”
;I wince and feel a hand on my right shoulder.
“Yes.” I respond.
“Relax. You’re always so uptight, Mr. Smith.” Daniel walks by me and to the bed, on which William is, basically, in a permanent vegetative state. Or whatever you want to call it on Level 2.
Jim’s team has been stretched thin as of late:
One Devo-ed (Wolf “Krotkie” Hafnian), hence on restricted duties.
One too young to work (H.M.)
One forced into exile (has to live and work by night, Richard Rockford)
And one too old and sick to work (William Conroy)…
Plus, one tied to Arkchil Network (yours truly). That is why they can’t give me any more responsibilities.
And one in London, tending to urgent, very important matters.
James knew it. But he resisted every attempt to bring in any new members, giving us only four names of Gold Card Holders he’d accept. Unfortunately, ALL of those respected gentlemen were already in their seventies, many with terminal illnesses. James knew all of them when they were in their forties, and it’s been 30 years.
During restricted-access meetings, to which James was not invited, Henry screamed and yelled that he was “tired of the geriatric facility”, and about the necessity to “liven up the scene with fresh workforce”.
We voted unanimously in favour of bringing new people. Only no one knew how. James can make your life hell, and he can easily paint you out of the picture if he does not like you. Inviting anyone without Jim’s approval was like throwing a rabbit into a cage with a tiger.
Finally, James relented and let Henry bring in a non-Gold Card holder, for someone to actually work.
And, after a tense week of getting used to, and threats from Henry (exactly as it happened with me), James accepted Daniel Garner.
Mr. Garner has a completely different approach to communication than James, or Henry, or William. He is warm, friendly, personable, and he touches you when he is talking to you. Like right now. His hand is on my shoulder. Who does that nowadays?
‘Did you?” I answer, having gathered my scattered wits. “Did you sleep well last night?”
Daniel slept with us, like every night since Henry sent him in.
“No. I woke up at about 2 am.” Daniel continues, taking off a light overcoat, and putting it on the bed.
He will be staying in Henry’s Chambers, so no need for me to worry as to where he is to put his belongings. He’s got a place.
“You should have taken some of Jim’s pills.” I try to joke and feel awful, as William is right here. In a coma, but here.
“Right. We already have one who did that.” Daniel smiles without a hint of embarrassment. “Anyway. The reason I mentioned last night, is because I wanted to share with you as to WHY I woke up.”
“Go ahead.” I encourage and know that I can expect ANYTHING from Daniel. Literally anything. He is not unhinged, not at all. But he is very brave and he takes a lot of risks to get where he needs to be. Stuff he does are not drunken stunts, like those of James. They are bold, calculated steps.
“I woke up because I felt someone’s intense attention. Turns out James was awake. I felt him sitting on the bed and scanning me. I never opened my eyes, though.” Having taken off the coat, Daniel goes to the kitchen and comes back with an Oreo cookie. They’re H.M.’s favourite, so James keeps them close to give one to his precious “Little Bear”, if he gets cranky.
“He would sense that you were awake. He can feel the difference between your sleeping and awakened state.” I try to explain to everyone right away that James Kellspell is psychic, this is not bullshit, and you have never encountered anything like that before. And if you’re trying to deceive him - he will not only detect it, but is going to want to know why, and that would attract even more of his attention to you.
“That I know.” Garner nods. He is not fazed, or surprised. He feels confident in a very fast, rocky, tricky mountain river that is James Kellspell.
“What information was he looking for?” I ask, and wonder if I should even continue this conversation. Normally, James would not search anyone’s mind while they’re asleep. It is a rude invasion. So, whatever Jim was looking for, he wanted to get secretly, bypassing his own rules. In this case, do I even need to stick my nose into that?
Daniel Garner fell on Jim’s head in a rather unexpected manner, after Henry got fed up with William’s inability to control James even when Professor Conroy was awake. Granted, he was not awake in weeks, ever since he OD’d on Jim’s pills trying to kill himself. He was brought back by the Arkabin doctors, but that did very little to his overall ability to function.
That left Henry with a soldier he could not control.
Hence, Daniel Garner.
So, turbulent times call for unapproved measures. I clearly saw why James would break into Daniel’s mind in search for intel as to who the man is.
“You’d be surprised, but he was not looking for any information.” Daniel finishes the cookie and rubs my shoulders. It feels unusual, because I barely know him. “I felt him penetrating rather deep levels of my consciousness to see if I was truly happy and OK the way I said I was, and if I was not, he wanted to see what I lacked, so he could possibly help me get to the happy place.”
“That is very nice of him. It is a good sign. He is warming up to you even after you asked William’s name removed from the Triangle, replaced by yours.” I say.
But what I think is a completely different story.
Constantly drunk, on drugs, suicidal, homicidal, depressed and twisted in knots, what does James Kellspell know about “happy places” in your mind. And if he does, how come he, himself, never visits those.
The fact that James WAS NOT looking for information in Daniel’s mind is not nearly as surprising as the real reason as to why he intruded upon Daniel.
“As for the names on the Triangle…” Daniel goes to a wooden stand that was placed here at his request, opens the door, gets a bottle of whiskey and pours himself a shot. “It was not me, it was Lord Carlton’s orders.”
“Sure.” I answer.
What do I really think? This built-in bar is the last thing we need with an suicidal alcoholic on premises.
However, strangely, James paid no attention to the new installation. He’s been ok with a couple of glasses of wine a day, as opposed to a bottle of whiskey. Maybe, after all, the bear in his dream had really vanished.
7:24 am
“Good morning, James!” Lady Anne comes into our bedroom in a firm gate with a resentful face.
“U-huh.” Jim nods, drinking some dark, red liquid from the glass. He can be so totally irreverent.
He is allowed to have 3 glasses of wine a day now. Something had to be done to wean him off enormous amounts of alcohol, when he failed to quit cold turkey.
“You have a letter from Henry.” And Lady Anne throws an envelope at James, who is sitting in bed with his bridgeplate.
Kellspell opens the envelope and pulls out a piece of paper. There is nothing written on it. It is all of red color.
“What does this mean?” I approach Jim and stare at the paper.
“Henry wanted to write me a letter with his blood, but there was so much of it that he just let the paper soak up all of it up, and this is what he sent me.”
It’s 7:30 pm and James has already fed Krotkie and put him to bed right by William. He, then, tucked in William’s body, kissed it goodnight and climbed into bed by Krotkie, who stretched happily all along, his tail to the side.
Daniel throws something at James as he is undressing.
“What is this?” James catches the object in the air, and unfolds it in surprise.
“It’s $100. I will give it to you if you stop biting your fingernails.”
Oh, no, no. I must watch all the newcomers and make sure they do not make rookie mistakes with James. I’m about to say it, but Lady Anne beats me to it.
“James does not understand money, Mr. Garner.” She says on her way from the kitchen to the Spiral Staircase, as she lives upstairs next to Dr. Michael’s. “Besides, nothing here can be obtained for money. Karmic credits only.”
“OK.” Daniel nods. “What do you suggest we do with that habit of his?”
“I have a plan.” Lady Anne goes to the kitchen and comes back momentarily with a rustling bag in her hands.
She approaches the bed. “Hey, Blinsky… Come!”
James gets excited and crawls from under the blankets. “Yes?”
Lady Anne has this nickname for James - “Blinsky”. He is Russian and he likes blintzes, she explained to me.
My heart would fall every time she called him that. It’s like calling a German “Sauer Kraut”. I thought Kellspell would be furious. But James Kellspell is never predictable. Apparently, he liked it.
“Here is a can of tuna and some cat toys.” Lady Anne places a grocery bag on the bed. “Quit biting your fingernails”.
“For how long?” James digs in the bag and admires the can of tuna, then he goes through the rest of the gifts - a catnip-filled mouse, some small bells and a ball made of glittering threads. His face lights up.
“Just tomorrow.” Lady Anne responds, satisfied with the impression she made on Kellspell with her offerings.
“For this kind of treasure I will quit until the end of the week.”
“You’ve got yourself a deal, young man!” Lady Anne scratches James behind his ear and goes upstairs.
Later on, in the dark:
“Your math skills are appalling, James.” Daniel whispers into Kellspell’s ear. “I gave you $100. Do you realise that at 63 cents a can you could buy yourself many pounds of canned tuna? And a few pounds of cat toys.”
James is silent for a very long time. Maybe, five minutes.
Laying at the other end of the bed, I slide my bridgeplate out to see what he is thinking. Not that I do not guess it already.
“What you just said does not make any sense, Daniel.” James, then, says very carefully, in a calming tone, as if talking to a very sick child. “I do not even know at what end to start unraveling a bunch of mangled notions you live by, for they have meaning to your sleeping mind. But I will try my best.”
Garner is now silent. He is a very smart man, and he knows he made a mistake. He can’t see where just yet. “Go ahead.”
“It is not the products that I want for money. That would be a meaningless, destructive path.” Kellspell sits up and leans over Daniel’s face. “It is Lady Anne’s love that I must win with my good behaviour. Her willingness to reimburse me for my efforts is a bonus I do not deserve. But it gives me a hope for the better future, because her heart is so pure. Where does MONEY fit into it?”
“And, again, tell me why Professor Conroy is like this? Is it because Henry made him take 200 of Jim’s sleeping pills all at once?”
“Pretty much.” I respond.
“No, fuck, Wallace!” Kellspell bursts into the bedroom, slamming the sliding door all the way to the wall. “Blame Henry for everything, will you?! William did not “die” because of Henry, or the sleeping pills, or even because of his other injuries and his old age. He did not survive the Gold Thread Ritual. It was going to take 6 months. As much as they tried to stretch it, it was still too much for him. He got knocked off 4 months into the process.”
“Is he dead?” Daniel sits on the bed and fixes William’s covers.
“No. No one can die here. You will fall into a limbo state. Then Father will revert it. I have every intention of bringing William to MEOL. I just need a safe place for his body for now. Two more years, or so. Once we cross through the Pearly Gates, he will be revived and ready to go with us.”