A ridiculous case

Константин Андреевич Квейкин
All the I carry with myself:
The passport, money in a purse,
What to do to me with you,
He glanced in the pocket,
It appeared nothing in it,
The purse lies one,
It began to rummage in a purse,
It was empty at all,
I told it that a purse empty,
And it turned and told me,
That it isn't empty at all that
They stayed at home in vain on the shelf,
Money three hours ago.
Well what you are a fool,
Come back quickly to the house,
Resort here then,
Money don't forget to take with itself,
On the way you be careful,
Resort here back,
I told you everything distinctly?
He understood everything, escaped,
I personally wouldn't catch up with it,
Quickly, ''bullet'' I escaped,
For now ran, I muttered,
Something it to itself under a nose,
Something it seems about the pump,
Precisely I couldn't understand.
He ran, ran, ran,
Each time hooted with laughter all the time, 
Wild laughter, as horse,
I turned for a house corner.
Five minutes I waited for it,
I see, he runs, as a horse.
I ran up to me and I told,
What money here, and further that?
And I told it that money is,
Go to theater quicker you.
And he speaks to me, as a parrot,
That money in the house I took,
I told it, that it езжал,
There is a performance ''Revenge''.
That for ''Revenge'' still such,
I looked at it and smiled,
You go give quicker,
There is such performance ''Revenge''.
He listened to everything and understood,
I ran and got on a bus.